The Colmatizer Mission: Teaching Love
by BakaProductions
Summary: This is actually a original fic. Stupid me, . It's not fan fiction. Meet Bernie, innocent girl, who likes Eric, a shy boy. She needs someone to help her get more sexy, or else she fears she'll loose him.
1. Chapter 1

The boy breathed in deeply, before grabbing the phone and dialing a anumber, seeming to have learned it. It rung five times, before a female voice answered.

"_Hello?_" a distant voice said hesitant.

"Bernie? Hi! Hello! Did I wake you? Sorry!" the boy rambled, smacking himself on the forehead in his mind. His eyes wandered to the clock on the wall and he almost groaned. Of course he had woken her, it was fucking three in the morning!

"_Oh, err.. It's okay, Eric, no bad feelings.._" the girl said with a quiet giggle.

Eirc ran his fingers nervously through his brown hair and bit his lip, manning up to the next step.

"So, I was wondering.. Do you have math test on Friday?" he said hopefully.

"_Eeh.. Yeah.. We all do._." she said sarcastically. Eric cursed himself for the stupid question.

"Well, ehm, can I walk you to it?" he said, trying to send her a mental puppy pout.

"_Sure, why not_." The girl said, and he could _hear_ her shrugging.

"Cool! Awesome!...Cool.. So I'll see you on Friday then?" he said, jumping around, pumping his fist in the air, quietly.

"_Don't forget Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday Eric!_" she laughed, sounding a little mocking. Eric slapped his forehead in reality now, and laughed nervously.

"Right, I'll remember those days too.." he said emberrassed.

"_Good night.. Eric.._" Bernie said quietly before hanging up.

Eric stared at the phone for a few minutes before smacking himself on the forehead again.

"Man, I'm such an IDIOT!" he said loudly, earning a bang in the wall from his brothers room.

Bernie Korn was an average cute girl. Nothing special. Average grades, average house, average family. She had a milk skintone, blue eyes and strawberry blonde hair. She was neither skinny or curvy. She was.. Average.

Her best friend was the complete opposite. Carmel Ferrando had long and wavy black hair, her eyes was big and brown and she was extremely curvy. While Bernie was kind of shy and friendly, Carmel was out-going and not afraid to be bitchy to get what she wanted. Friendship between such different people sounds impossible, but Carmel loved Bernie's innocent and timid attitude, and Bernie admired Carmel's confidence.

"Eh? Good for you, Bernie! Finally that pipsqueak asked you out!" Carmel said with a glare against the table where the 'pipsqueak' sat.

Bernie blushed and stammered protests. "But, but it's not a real date!" she exclaimed and stabbed her jelly with a spoon.

Carmel flipped her hair, and frowned at Bernie's acts. "Hell yeah it is! Stop fumbling! You did awesome on the phone!" she reassured her with a smile, managing to steal her strawberry jelly.

"Heey!" Bernie whined but gave up as half of the jelly disspeared into Carmel's cherry mouth. "Even if it was a date, I wouldn't stand five seconds before he labeled me as a dork." she sighed and glanced at Eric's brown hair that seemed bronze in the sunlight that flowed through the window.

"Que? What are you talking about? Your cute and so adorable, innocent like a white flower!" Carmel said, making hearts in the air with her spoon.

"Excactly! I'm innocent, child-like! Not sexy!" Bernie sighed and sipped on her cola.

Carmel looked deep in thought, her hand with the spoon slowly lowering itself to the table. One inch above the table, she smacked it down, making an loud metallic noise vibrate though the room. "Easy, you need someone to teach you!" she yelled pushing her right hand in the air. She ignored the stares she got from the sophomores, they wasn't used to her yet.

"What?!" Bernie shrieked loudly, getting stared from everyone, seeing she didn't really speak up.

"Come on! You'd never heard of Cole Filler?" Carmel said with a suggestive smile while she made incoherent signs in the air with her hands, which probably everyone except Bernie understood.

"No!" Bernie shook her head wildly, and stared freaked at Carmel. "I'm not going to that sick perverted-"

Carmel hissed at Bernie to make her shut up. "Uno: Cole Filler is not a pervert!" she said holding a shaking finger in Bernie's face. "Dos: He learned me everything! EVERYTHING!" she yelled dramatically, lifting another finger. "Tres: He loves blonde girls!" she said with a grin.

Bernie grimaced and pushed Carmel's tan hand out of her face. "But I will never dare to-" she began but was cut off by Carmel hitting her spoon in the table.

"You will!" she said loudly, making people surrounding inch their chairs away. This was her third breakout in less than five minutes, not good.

"Bu-"

"No!"

"I-"

"Ah!"

"You-"

"Nah!"

Carmel grinned, it was clear she had won. "Hold on! I'll give you his number!" she said excitedly, rummaging through her purse.

Bernie sighed and poked her half-eaten sandwich in despair. _Out of all perverts, she chooses the ultimate one.._

While Bernie thought miserable thoughts, Carmel had dialed a number on her cell phone and was grinning in mischief. "Hola! Come estas, Cole?!" she said loudly, earning a booming reply. She laughed into her phone and looked at her friend. "I have a favour to ask you.. And you owe me one so don't you dare say anything..!" she more like whispered loudly into the phone. "Yeah, it's the one I've been telling you about.. Yes, I know right? Pffh." she babbled, sometimes blurting out in loud spanish. "Oh, your a darling! I love you!" she called into the phone before clapping it shut and giggling in victory.

"See? That wasn't so hard now was it?" she asked Bernie, who just stared at her in disbelief.

"But he's the one that-" Bernie began but stopped herself. Carmel had already warned her about insulting her teacher.

"Come on already! You complained about being innocent and shy five minutes ago!" Carmel said with a small glare. "He'll make you moy sexy in snip-snap!" she said and snapped her fingers dramatically.

A loud ring drowned Bernie's protest and Carmel swinged her purse into her arms and almost jogged out of the cafeteria.

"Damn." Bernie whispered.


	2. Chapter 2

**This is where I'm stuck. Ahahaha, mock me in reviews please! I don't know what to do really, it reminds be too obviously about a chick-flick.**

Bernie dropped the curtain with a loud whimper. She dragged a hand slowly through her frizzy hair and had a look of utmost horror on her face. Why, just _why_ were Cole Filler's car parked outside her house? And why was he getting out of it and strolling up to her door? With his tight jeans on, and a band t-shirt that scared her. His hair was gelled back and he had some shades on in the bright sun.

A shrill note rang through the house, and Bernie almost shrieked in fright but settled on clutching a teddy bear close to her chest. There was no indication that her parents were going to answer the door. Bernie slapped herself when she remembered that they were indeed not home at the moment. She bit her lip and peeked meekly through her window again, and leaped back immediately with a scream.

Outside her window stood a smiling Filler, dark blond hair shining in the sun and white teeth showing. He was really attractive. And he was still in high school. "I'm guessing you're Bernadette." he purred while pushing his dark shades down to show his blue eyes, which were twinkling in an intimidating fashion. "Bernie." she spat without thinking. He shook his head, "No, that makes you sound like a guy. And you," he said, and let his eyes roam over her form "are _definitely_ not a guy." he finished with a smirk. Bernie blushed down to her collarbone. Which caused his smirk to widen. "I'm coming in to join you." he announced and disappeared from her view. "What? NO!" Bernie said loudly, scrambling to find her robe or something. Her room was a mess, ever since Carmel decided to go through her wardrobe last night. The padding sound of feet reached her ears and she made a sound that resembled a "Eek," before flinging a blanket around her, back to the door.

He opened the door and raised an eyebrow at the mess then he raised another at the sight of her. "Really?" he said into the air. Bernie blushed even more and scowled at him. He just flashed a charming smile and briskly stepped over one of the many small piles of clothing on the floor. "And there's my nun." he said sarcastically, eyeing the blue blanket that covered everything except her face and her hands, which were gripping said blanket tightly. "Rather nun than slut." Bernie said under her breath.

This time the sunglasses came off of his face and was tucked away in his jeans pocket. "Well, even nuns have sex appeal." he purred, and his vibrant eyes seemed to mentally sweep off the blanket. Bernie gasped in horror and blushed beet red. Why did she sleep in her tiny sling? "The blanket goes off." he murmured as he approached her further. It took only a little satin top under his feet and he slipped; lunged forward, taking the screaming girl with him to the bed. Bernie stared at him with an open mouth as he shook his head. "You have a soft... Bed." he commented.


End file.
